Boo for Corey Clark
Current Mood: Giddy! It’s Hughsday and another rerun of House is on tonite! Woot! Woot! VOTE FOR HIM (because any excuse for me to buy TV Guide is a good one)
Current Music: Spongebob Squarepants theme song
I wonder what ever possessed ABC when they decided to invest their time in an exclusive interview with Corey Clark, AI Season 2 reject. The man lies!!! And it doesn’t help the fact he looks so mother fuckin’ shady…and so greasy, flies drown when they land on him. He just made Paula Abdul slightly less despicable.
The "American Idol" contestant who claims to have had an affair with judge Paula Abdul was cited on a misdemeanor battery charge after getting into an alleged food fight with his record company manager at a hotel, Sacramento police said Monday (link)
Grooooooaaaaaaaaaan
Just ingested two tacos and a mexican pizza in less than 10 minutes. For those who know me and my eating habits, this is quite a feat…and now I am seeing colors everywhere (is this a sympton caused by Clostridium Botulinum?) Ooooooh….am I getting my comeuppance Ron? You prayed for this moment, didn’t you?
I noticed lately my Friendster profile has been getting more hits than usual…maybe it’s because there are curious people out there who think my "Aaaah Oooogaaaah Oooogaaah" pic is real. Seriously, Keanu won’t even give me the time of day if I had come up to him…he”ll just probably kick my ass back to the Matrix. So to answer those curious lurkers, the answer is "yes"…ok let me recant, "NO!!!"
Anyway, I promised RR I’m going to be easy on T.C this week. Aaaaw but Daaaaaaaaaad. I want to be mean!!! **slumps on creaky office chair**
I’ll try my hardest to steer away from any TomKat (well mostly Tom) bashing. In recent news:
Paul Bettany (aka the sole owner of Jennifer Connelly’s vertical smile) is short listed for the Batman sequel (sans Katie Holmes) and is being considered for the role of the "Joker" . On the other end of that list, is George Mcfly himself, Crispin Glover. Haven’t seen "Batman Begins" yet, but because I’m an evil spendthrift and a DVD whore, I’ll most probably buy the movie once it gets released. Sorry to say, with my current situation, I can’t go out and watch movies out of vagary.
Thanks to Lindsay Lohan, I’ve now diverted my attention from TC to her witty remark of not involving herself with other people’s drama.
Good for you Lindsay. She was just merely expressing herself after being interviewed about how she felt about patronizing American de Beers. There’s been a lot of hullabaloo surrounding de Beers’ participation in the eviction of Gana and Gwi bushmen. I just hope Lindsay realizes Bushmen and "carpet munchers" are nooooooooot exactly the same…
45th Post!

Take out your party hats…this is cause for celebration!…ooooor maybe NOT!
I love it when the subject of my ire is being exposed to the world as a crazy asshat and possibly **crossing fingers** a soon to be "has been". I mean what better time to dismiss Mr. Cruise than now; while he is reaching the peak of his insanity. Calling Matt Lauer glib…HAH…if you ask me, he’s lucky he only got squirted with water at his London premier. I would’ve emptied a bottle full of lemon juice and aimed straight for his eye! Ok so it’s great he’s passionate about life, he just has to stay the fuck away from people. He is preachy and god damn condescending to others who don’t share his beliefs. When it comes to psychiatry, he condemns people for going that route. He claims he’s learned all that is needed to know about this science…this coming from a dyslexic highschool drop out who never continued his studies…street smart? If he didn’t wiggle his ass in Risky Business he wouldn’t be making "glib" comments about Matt Lauer and Brook Shields today. He just thinks he’s the shiznit…his fans sure do think so…I always find myself changing the channel when I see his mug on the screen. He kinda jumps out of the tv at ya…after a while you want to call the cops on him because he’s trashing your furniture and forcing you to convert into Scientology. FAH-REAK!!!
On a happier note:
Happy Christening Day to Jacob Dolendo. I’ll see you and your parents later:-)
Congratulations to The San Antonio Spurs for winning their 3rd NBA Championship. Congrats to the Detriot Pistons for at least winning the Eastern Conference Championship. Nothing against the Pistons, but I am from the West Siiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiide. Sorry na lang…
I miss House!!! If anyone feels like sending me a birthday gift, the First Season Box set release date is on the 30th of August.
Losing at the Wynn
What I’m Listening to: Embrasse Moi - Les Nubians
Current Mood: Lazier than a pregnant Britney Spears who has just emptied entire contents of fridge
Vegas was great…although we literally just went there, farted around and went home. Saying Vegas is crazy is an understatement. But my God, we got there at 4am and the casino was still filled with inebriated geriatric citizens and pseudo heterosexuals. I loved it!!!
We stayed at the new Wynn Hotel and Casino which was gorgeous however too much hype has been exaggerated into it’s arrival that I was slightly disappointed when we got there. I was hoping for excellent customer service but apparently orangutans work behind the registration desk; and lemurs slave at accounts receivables. For 300 bucks a night, I expected nothing but the best service. Instead, I got a gigantic turd on a plastic platter (metaphorically speaking).
La Reve was spectacular…if you are into gawking at half naked buff and totally yoked out 20-something men drenched in water…**fans self**. It was awesome…my husband gives it an ok since he only saw one pair of breasts…and the owner was so muscular it was hard figuring out if we were seeing a woman’s chest of a man’s.
I give it a 7 out of 10…maybe I’m just the type who likes a straight-up strip tease. I’ll pay $130 to see that!!!
Enrich Thy Vocabulary
Learned new words today !!!
Lockblock
When one person prematurely trys to open the passenger door on a vehicle while the driver simultaneously trys to unlock the door, causing it to relock and keep the passenger outside.
"Hey man let me in the car already, it’s cold out here!"
"I’ve been trying to, but you’ve lockblocked me like 5 times in a row now!
*frosty
Fellatio with a mouth full of ice.
She gave me a frosty but it was too cold to take for more than a few minutes.
Do I really need to know how he popped the question? Seeing two gorillas get it on is more riveting than hearing psycho-put-your-manners-back-in Tom Cruise break into playful banter. Honestly, the man likes it greek**
** Greek
Anal sex. Used mostly as a euphemism in prostitution circles.
I looked at the newspaper ad of ‘Lola’, she specifically said ‘No Greek’.
Vegas Baby!!!
What I’m Listening to: Fix You - Coldplay
Current Mood: excited to leave for vegas for the weekend…sad to leave my babies back home
I normally am diligent with updating my blog but work has been such a fucking bitch…specifically my accounting lady, "Monster Woman Sandy" who hounds me to no end with things SHE’s supposed to be doing. Fucking imbecile!!!
Hubby and I are leaving for Vegas (the actual Soddom and Gomorra) tonight. I am both excited and sad to leave. Although I have been begging to get away, I haven’t gotten used to leaving my son, Matthieu and my daughter, Maia…especially for more than 24 hours. I keep having guilty thoughts which is what most mothers do (unless those mothers are crack whore addicts who got knocked up by toothless inebriated reprobates). I’m back hoping to win some moolah so I can spoil them with toys and clothes. Maia needs a new stuffed toy to chew (she loves to hug her Pooh Bear at the same time taste his fur…SHE’S TEETHING ok!!!).
Anyway, right now is a good time to share that I am fucking livid of my ex-boyfriend (who up to now makes me wonder what the fuck I was thinking when I hooked up with him and how I lasted 3 years). I mean, he’s jealous of anything and a bit of an insecure asshat. Everything is a pissing contest….we got a chance to chat online (because I was an stupid enough to give my email address back then) last week. I wish I could post it here so everyone could see what a psycho he is. Move on dude!!! You’re married and so am I. And I wouldn’t change anything in my life even you had the power to turn back time and TRY to keep me. " I broke up with you before I found out you cheated on me " (which hurt…but really, I wished he did…made my mission to break free very easy). "Way to go…now instead of me moving on with my life and forgetting all the grief you caused me, you made me go on with my life perpetually hating your guts" Leave me the fuck alone!!! Oh, and it’s not "gitgo", it’s "get-go" you bung hole!
The Week As Observed by Moi (June 6 - 11)
Brangelina’s movie, “Mr and Mrs Smith” got released in theatres this week. Even though the movie fared well, still no admissions or denials of their love affair were extracted out of the hottest couple. Drove the masses crazy…I don’t really give a shit because I would rather people leave them alone. They’re too beautiful to be harassed. 
Hey, I’d let go of the fact coquettish Angelina carried a vial of Billy Bob’s blood around her gorgeous neck for a while…or the fact that when the woman’s horny she gets some ASAP, at the most beautiful places only men and lesbians can dream about.
TomKat on the otherhand is succeeding in brainstorming me into watching their movies. I must say, evil can sneak into your subconscious the same way, narcotics keep showing up in Macauley Culkin’s possession. Tom still astounds me with his weirdness; it’s mind numbing. When confronted with questions on whether Nicole was the love of his life, his retort was for the interviewer to “put his manners back in”. I guess since it didn’t involve his movie or his religion, it hit him where it hurt the most. His big tumescent head.
The softer side of me…
It’s a dreary sunday. I just had reheated coffee which I had purchased at Starbucks the day before and plopped my weary body into the welcoming arms of our patio chair…and then continued to observe the stillness of the day. The only sound to be heard is the incessant hooting of an owl that has perched itself on one of the rooptops. I sit and and listen as I sipped my coffee and purse my lips at the bitter taste of it.
I find the day quite calming albeit it was nippy. Not a blue hue in the sky to be enjoyed and yet, everything seems to be peaceful. Even when the usual visits from the hummingbirds had not occured today, I still found hope in the promise of the peaceful hours to come.
Life is what happens when you stop and listen…even in the most absurd and horrid moments, there is hope that endures. We have a choice to overcome or let it eat us alive. I choose the former…take pleasure in the details.
Enjoy your day everyone…CARPE DIEM.
Hugh Turns 46 Today
I knew this day was special!!! I had an inkling ever since I woke up at 8 (and NORMALLY we as a family, wake up past 9), and decided to skip my way over to Starbucks and have not one - but 2 shots of expresso. I am fucking wired!!!

I love you Hugh!!! Have a happy and bliss filled birthday. If I were your wife I’d send you a b-day strip-o-gram, hell, I’d have her give you a "happy ending" too just so you’d be all raaaaaandy on your special day.
Losing It
Tom is on a mission. He is out there trying to prove something…
I am struggling as to what exactly and why we have give a flying fuck…By the way, Loco Tom was at it again at Lenos. Somebody hold that imp down before he hurts another harmless leather couch. Do you know how many cows were sacrificed so that rich and famous bums can sit there?!! Shame on you Tom and your cradle robbing self!!!
Incidently, the age gap between him and Katie is the same as Hugh Laurie and me…Hugh can rob - no, RUB me anytime. My bum is his for the taking.
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Ooooooooh **swoons as Hugh Laurie sings to Minnie the Moocher** Aaaaaaaah…what a panty peeler!
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The horse shit that is “TomKat” has to sail the fuck away…if not, I can always have Mike Tyson help out. I’ll just simply tell good ‘ol Mikey that Tom wants to get in the ring with him and that Tom’s religion is requiring him to gut him like fish.